Come eliminare lo stress dalla tua vita

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Le soluzioni nel lungo termine

Le soluzioni nel lungo termine implicano un cambiamento significativo a vari livelli. Non sono rimedi immediati, e questo è ciò che le rende poco appetibili. La società odierna infatti vuole tutto e subito. In pochi però capiscono che per risolvere i propri problemi sia necessaria una revisione integrale della propria vita. Non è pensabile che per rilassarsi sia necessario trovare dieci minuti ogni ora per respirare o per fare una passeggiata all’aperto. C’è bisogno di qualcosa di diverso, che risolva il tuo stress alla radice. E non ti nasconderò che in alcuni casi si tratta di strategie avanzate. Ma se sei uno studente di crescita personale non potrai certo ignorarle e sarai anzi curioso di conoscerle. Iniziamo.

Cambia paradigma

La prima soluzione nel lungo termine consiste nell’operare un cambio di paradigma. Devi iniziare a pensare che sei tu a causarti ogni stress. Detto così, può sembrare una secchiata d’acqua gelata. In effetti lo è. Ma se sei arrivato qui vuol dire che non hai paura della verità. Detto in altre parole, vuol dire che sei tu a decidere in quali situazioni metterti, ma soprattutto sei tu a decidere come reagire. Non sto dicendo che sia colpa tua ogni volta che ti stressi o provi ansia. Voglio dire però che in ogni momento puoi impostare una reazione diversa dal solito e puoi affrontare ogni situazione con spirito diverso. Ma in cosa consiste esattamente questo cambio di paradigma e come può essere effettuato? Qui sotto trovi gli step principali.

1) Passa alla modalità “creazione”

Il primo passo è complicato ma straordinario. Devi ribaltare il paradigma ordinario, cioè smettere di credere che siano gli altri a causarti i problemi, a stressarti e a renderti l’esistenza impossibile. Ma soprattutto devi rinunciare alla mentalità da vittima e assumerti al 100% la responsabilità della tua vita. Vuol dire che dovrai rinunciare a lamentarti dei tuoi problemi, ad accusare i tuoi genitori, i tuoi figli o il tuo datore di lavoro per come ti senti. E devi iniziare a pensare che sei tu a creare ogni reazione. Sei tu a sentirti stressato. Non è pensabile che ciascuno di noi proietti i propri problemi sugli altri, perché così la vita diventa davvero insostenibile, senza nessun responsabile. Smetti di credere che sia la tua vita a decidere di te e pensa che puoi essere tu a crearla.

Perché la modalità “creazione” è efficace?

Perché se ti assumi interamente la responsabilità della tua vita, sai che in ogni caso sarai tu a scegliere la reazione più opportuna ad ogni data situazione. Nessuno potrà più stressarti, perché saprai che lo stress è una risposta della tua mente e non è nemmeno la più efficace. Nella maggior parte dei casi sentirti stressato serve solo a peggiorare i tuoi problemi. Eppure la maggior parte di noi reagisce freneticamente e con ansia proprio alle difficoltà che richiederebbero freddezza e lucidità. Se rimarrai calmo e centrato quando la tua reazione di base sarebbe distruttiva, immagina quanto stress potrai lasciar andare.

Ma come faccio a non stressarmi con questa modalità?

Inizialmente essere responsabile del 100% della tua vita potrebbe farti sentire ancora più stressato. Infatti non è possibile assumersi l’intera responsabilità della propria esistenza in dieci minuti. Si tratta di un percorso lento, all’interno del quale cambi di volta in volta le tue reazioni alle situazioni ordinarie.

Ho bisogno di qualche esempio

Se ad esempio ti trovi di fronte al tuo datore di lavoro sfacciato e impertinente, la prossima volta che ti si rivolgerà duramente, non rispondere allo stesso modo di sempre. Non arrabbiarti, non accumulare tensione. Lascia andare lo stimolo stressogeno e scegli una risposta opportuna. Non fidarti della mente che ti dice di reagire aspramente. Crea la tua risposta. Fallo per te. Immagina come ti sentirai se avrai risposto in maniera gentile ad un commento brusco. Ma come pensi di fare una cosa del genere finché ti sentirai schiacciato dai tuoi problemi e non ti sarai assunto la responsabilità del modo in cui reagisci?

2) Lascia andare

Per riuscire ad assumerti la responsabilità delle tue reazioni emotive non è sufficiente cambiare paradigma da un punto di vista teorico. Chiaramente è necessario cambiare mentalità, ma ciò potrebbe rimanere astratto e senza valore. Immagina infatti di essere convinto di avere effettuato il cambio di paradigma. Sei sicuro che a questo punto riuscirai a gestire le situazioni stressanti in modo efficace? Se hai notato, nel paragrafo precedente ho parlato di “lasciar andare”. In effetti la chiave di tutto sta proprio qui. Per lasciar andare devi rimanere nel disagio, vale a dire devi accettare la spiacevole sensazione che provi quando il tuo capo di rimprovera. Devi accettare persino il fatto che non sarai in grado di rispondere in maniera opportuna e che cadrai in preda alle tue ansie.

3) Ma come faccio a lasciar andare? Diventa zen

Per lasciar andare hai bisogno di rimanere presente nel momento in cui si presenta una situazione stressante. Per questo ti consiglio di iniziare subito una pratica meditativa, se non l’hai già fatto. Inizia sedendoti comodamente per dieci minuti e concentrati sul respiro. Quando ti distrai, lascia andare la distrazione. In questo modo alleni la mente a rimanere presente e a non cadere in preda ai pensieri. Porta la pratica meditativa nella quotidianità. Quando senti che lo stress ti sta per assalire, lascia andare e rimani presente. Abbandonati al momento presente. Se vuoi maggiori delucidazioni sul tema, non perderti “Il potere di adesso” di Eckhart Tolle.

4) Pensa positivo e riprogramma il tuo subconscio

Non sottovalutare il potere dell’ottimismo. Anche in questo caso non puoi fare a meno della meditazione per diventare più consapevole dei tuoi pensieri e in particolare di quei pattern che ti trascinano nella negatività. Ma puoi anche dedicarti a degli esercizi pratici che ti rendano più positivo:

Visualizzazione creativa

Si tratta di un potente metodo con cui riprogrammi il tuo subconscio. In pratica ti siedi, chiudi gli occhi e ti abbandoni all’immaginazione. In particolare, focalizza l’attenzione su come ti sentiresti se non avessi più problemi. Dipingi visivamente l’immagine del tuo volto rilassato. Immagina di vivere una vita straordinaria, senza preoccupazioni. Usa la fantasia. Cerca di farti trascinare dalle emozioni. La visualizzazione non deve essere un’esperienza piatta, altrimenti rischia di essere inefficace. Il problema, appunto, è che richiede fantasia e un livello di base di consapevolezza e di positività per un’esperienza ottimale. Ma anche qui la chiave è una pratica costante e regolare.

Affermazioni positive

Non vado pazzo per le affermazioni positive, ma fidati che ripeterti una frase per cinque/dieci minuti di fila ha i suoi effetti. In pratica porti il cervello a credere che ciò che ti ripeti sia vero. Puoi ripeterti come un mantra: “Sono calmo e rilassato“. Sfrutta l’emotività e rimani perfettamente concentrato durante l’esercizio. Anche qui è necessaria una pratica regolare per ottenere i massimi benefici.

5) Liberati dal giudizio degli altri

Questo è un problema insormontabile per gran parte delle persone. Ma se sei uno studente di crescita personale, prima o poi dovrai lasciar andare il giudizio degli altri. Esso è un’enorme fonte di stress e ci condiziona terribilmente. Ma puoi iniziare a fregartene. Ricorda che non devi niente a nessuno e che nessuno può decidere della tua vita.

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